From Using your Brain for a change by Richard Bandler.
1. Identify context.
First you identify an area where you are broken or stuck. Where or when would you like to behave or respond differently than you do now? It might be something like nail biting, or getting angry with your husband. In my case, it was getting nervous at team meetings.
2. Identify cue picture.
"Now I want you to identify what you actually see in that situation just before you start doing the behaviour that you don't like. Since many people are on 'automatic pilot' at that time, it may help to actually do whatever has to proceed the behaviour, so you can see what it actually looks like." For nail biting it would be physically moving your nails up to your mouth. For me, it was the fidgeting as I vividly imagined my turn to speak approach. Since this is the cue for a response that you don't like there should be some unpleasantness associated with this picture. For me, I could be safely sitting in the comfort of my own home, with my eyes closed, imagining myself at a meeting and being next to speak. Just by imagining this vividly I could be close to a panic attack and I wasn't even there! I think this is why this technique works so well, because it uses the language of the brain (images). If you were to be sitting at home and tell your heart to beat faster, it wouldn't respond. But, if you were to imagine walking down a dark alley late at night in a dodgy neighbourhood then your heart is likely to be pounding.
The more unpleasant this cue picture is, the better it will work.
3. Create outcome picture
"Now create a second image of how you would see yourself differently if you had already accomplished the desired change. I want you to keep adjusting this image until you have one that is really attractive to you - one that draws you strongly."
4. Swish
"Now 'swish' these two pictures. Start with seeing that cue picture, big and bright. Then put a small, dark image of the outcome picture in the lower right corner. The small dark image will grow big and bright and cover the first picture, which will get dim and shrink away as fast as you can say 'swish.' Then blank out the screen, or open your eyes. Swish it again a total of five time. Be sure to blank out the screen at the end of each swish."
5. Test
a. "Now picture that first image.... What happens?" If the swish has been effective, this will be hard to do. The picture will tend to fade out away and be replaced by the second image of yourself as you want to be.
b. The other way to test is to put yourself back in the cue situation.
If the old behavior is still there when you test, try the process again. You may need to try a variation on it. For me "distance" worked much better than "big and small." That is, rather than starting with the cue image big and bright and shrinking it while making the outcome picture big and bright, I would start with the cue picture "in my face" and move it off into the distance draining all the colour away while moving the outcome picture from off in distance to be up bright and close and in full colour.
Try it - it works.
Saturday, April 21, 2007
Team Meetings
This post is about an extremely powerful yet simple technique that has worked well for me. The technique is taken from "Using your Brain for a Change" by Richard Bandler.
Before using this technique I can remember sitting at weekly team meetings waiting for my turn to tell everyone what I'd been doing for the last week. I only had to speak for a couple of minutes and I knew everyone there very well. I didn't have to stand up to speak, I just had to say a few simple words and then it would be on to the next person. Simple, huh? Yeah right! Not for someone that suffers from panic attacks.
I would be taking slow deep breaths, saying "relax, relax, relax," to myself. I was so fired up that I was sweating, my hands, arms and legs were all shaking below the table as my turn approached. I was fully aware of everyone in the room. There were twelve people seated around that table and I knew exactly when each one was breathing in or out. My peripheral vision detected every movement. Very little of what was said registered with me. Each time someone finished talking and the next person around the table start, my heart rate would move up another notch. I would sweat more and tremble more and pray that I wasn't about to be told something that I needed to write down. I would feel a wave of heat flush through my body and then worry that people would wonder why my face had gone all red. Now I'm the next in line to talk and I swear I'm about to have a heart attack. The pulse in my neck is pounding violently as I glance at the exits. You can probably guess what happened next...
I believe that I can now get through these meetings due to the Swish pattern. I've used it successfully in many other situations as well. It works by linking a cue for an unwanted experience with the desired outcome. The example given in the book is for a person who bites their nails. The cue is them raising their nails towards their mouth. This cue is then linked to an image of them as a person who doesn't bite their nails. This doesn't just mean an image of them with long finger nails but an image of who they would be, and how they would behave if they no longer had this habit.
Click here for details on how perform the Swish pattern. Practice it. It only takes about five minutes and has worked for me.
Before using this technique I can remember sitting at weekly team meetings waiting for my turn to tell everyone what I'd been doing for the last week. I only had to speak for a couple of minutes and I knew everyone there very well. I didn't have to stand up to speak, I just had to say a few simple words and then it would be on to the next person. Simple, huh? Yeah right! Not for someone that suffers from panic attacks.
I would be taking slow deep breaths, saying "relax, relax, relax," to myself. I was so fired up that I was sweating, my hands, arms and legs were all shaking below the table as my turn approached. I was fully aware of everyone in the room. There were twelve people seated around that table and I knew exactly when each one was breathing in or out. My peripheral vision detected every movement. Very little of what was said registered with me. Each time someone finished talking and the next person around the table start, my heart rate would move up another notch. I would sweat more and tremble more and pray that I wasn't about to be told something that I needed to write down. I would feel a wave of heat flush through my body and then worry that people would wonder why my face had gone all red. Now I'm the next in line to talk and I swear I'm about to have a heart attack. The pulse in my neck is pounding violently as I glance at the exits. You can probably guess what happened next...
I believe that I can now get through these meetings due to the Swish pattern. I've used it successfully in many other situations as well. It works by linking a cue for an unwanted experience with the desired outcome. The example given in the book is for a person who bites their nails. The cue is them raising their nails towards their mouth. This cue is then linked to an image of them as a person who doesn't bite their nails. This doesn't just mean an image of them with long finger nails but an image of who they would be, and how they would behave if they no longer had this habit.
Click here for details on how perform the Swish pattern. Practice it. It only takes about five minutes and has worked for me.
Sunday, April 15, 2007
Public Speaking and Panic Attacks
It is often observed that many people’s top ranking fear is not death but having to speak in public. The joke is that these people would rather be lying in the casket at the funeral than giving the eulogy. Public speaking for people who suffer from panic attacks or general anxiety often becomes a major source of worry weeks or even months before the speaking event is to occur.
These speaking engagements do not necessarily have to be the traditional “on a podium” events but can be as simple as an office meeting where the individual is expected to express an opinion or give verbal feedback. The fear of public speaking and panic attacks in this case centers on having an attack while speaking. The individual fears being incapacitated by the anxiety and hence unable to complete what he or she is saying. The person imagines fleeing the spotlight and having to make all kinds of excuses later for their undignified departure out the office window….
This differs slightly from the majority of people who fear public speaking because their fear tends to revolve around going blank while speaking or feeling uncomfortable under the spotlight of their peers. The jitters or nerves of speaking in public are of course a problem for this group as well, but they are unfamiliar with that debilitating threat which is the panic attack, as they most likely have not experienced one before.
So how should a person with an anxiety issue tackle public speaking?
Stage one is accepting that all these bizarre and quite frankly unnerving sensations are not going to go away overnight. In fact, you are not even going to concern yourself with getting rid of them for your next talk. When they arrive during a speech/meeting, you are going to approach them in a new manner. What we need to do is build your confidence back to where it used to be before any of these sensations ever occurred. This time you will approach it in a unique, empowering manner, allowing you to feel your confidence again. It is said that most of the top speakers are riddled with anxiety before speaking, but they somehow use this nervousness to enhance their speech. I am going to show you exactly how to do this, although I know that right now if you suffer from public speaking and panic attacks you may find it difficult to believe you can ever overcome it.
My first point is this and it is important. The average healthy person can experience an extreme array of anxiety and very uncomfortable sensations while giving a speech and is in no danger of ever losing control, or even appearing slightly anxious to the audience. No matter how tough it gets, you will always finish your piece, even if at the outset it feels very uncomfortable to go on. You will not become incapacitated in any way.
The real breakthrough for if you suffer from public speaking and panic attacks happens when you fully believe that you are not in danger and that the sensations will pass.
“I realize you (the anxiety) hold no threat over me.”
What keeps a panic attack coming again and again is the fear of the fear—the fear that the next one will really knock your socks off and you feel you were lucky to have made it past the last one unscathed. As they were so unnerving and scary, it is your confidence that has been damaged by previous anxiety episodes. Once you fully understand you are not under any threat, then you can have a new response to the anxiety as it arises while speaking.
Defeating public speaking and panic attacks...
There is always a turning point when a person moves from general anxiety into a panic attack, and that happens with public speaking when you think to yourself:
"I won’t be able to handle this in front of these people."
That split second of self-doubt leads to a rush of adrenaline, and the extreme anxiety arrives in a wave like format. If, however, when you feel the initial anxiety and you react with confidence that this is not a threat to you, you will move out of the anxiety rapidly. Using this new approach is a powerful ally because it means it is okay to feel scared and feel the anxiety when speaking–that is fine; you are going to feel it and move with and through the sensations in your body and out the other side. Because he or she is feeling very anxious, often before the talk has begun, that person may feel they have already let themselves down. Now, you can relax on that point. It is perfectly natural to feel the anxiety. Take for example the worst of the sensations you have ever experienced in this situation—be it general unease to loss of breath. You will have an initial automatic reaction that says:
“Danger–I’m going to have an episode of anxiety here and I really can’t afford that to happen.”
At this point most people react to that idea and confirm it must be true because of all of the unusual feelings they are experiencing. This is where your thinking can lead you down a train of thought that creates a cycle of anxiety that produces a negative impact on your overall presenting skills.
So let that initial “oh dear, not now” thought pass by, and follow it up immediately with the attitude of:
“There you are–I’ve been wondering when you would arrive. I’ve been expecting you to show up—by the way, I am not in the least threatened by any of the strange sensations you are creating—I am completely safe here.”
The key to controlling your fear of public speaking and panic attacks is that instead of pushing the emotional energy and excitement down into your stomach, you are moving out through it. Your body is in a slightly excited state, exactly as it should be while giving a speech, so release that energy in your self-expression. Push it out through your presentation not down into your stomach. You push it out by expressing yourself more forcefully. In this way you turn the anxiety to your advantage by using it to deliver a speech where you come across more alive, energetic and in the present moment. When you notice the anxiety drop as it does when you willingly move into it. Fire a quick thought off when you get a momentary break (as I am sure you have between pieces), asking it for “more.” You want more of its intense feelings as you are interested in them and are absolutely not threatened by them.
It seems like a lot of things to be thinking about while talking to a group of people, but it is not really. You’d be amazed how many different non-related thoughts you can have while speaking. This approach is about adopting a new attitude of confidence to what you might have deemed a serious threat up until now. This tactic will truly help you with fear of public speaking and panic attacks you have associated with them.
If your predominant fear of the speaking engagement is driven by a feeling of being trapped, then I would suggest factoring in some mental releases that can be prepared before the event. For example, some meetings/speeches allow for you to turn the attention back to the room to get feedback etc. from the group.
If possible, you might want to prepare such opportunities in your own mind before the engagements. This is not to say you have to ever use them, but people in this situation often remark that just having small opportunities where attention can be diverted for the briefest of moments can make the task seem less daunting. It may even be something as simple as having people introduce themselves or opening the floor to questions. I realize these diversions are not always possible and depend on the situation, but anything you can factor in that makes you feel less trapped or under the spotlight is worth the effort and can help alleviate fear of public speaking and panic attacks.
Click Here to learn more
Joe Barry is an international panic disorder coach. His informative site on all issues related to panic and anxiety attacks can be found here:http://www.panicportal.com
This article is copywritten material
These speaking engagements do not necessarily have to be the traditional “on a podium” events but can be as simple as an office meeting where the individual is expected to express an opinion or give verbal feedback. The fear of public speaking and panic attacks in this case centers on having an attack while speaking. The individual fears being incapacitated by the anxiety and hence unable to complete what he or she is saying. The person imagines fleeing the spotlight and having to make all kinds of excuses later for their undignified departure out the office window….
This differs slightly from the majority of people who fear public speaking because their fear tends to revolve around going blank while speaking or feeling uncomfortable under the spotlight of their peers. The jitters or nerves of speaking in public are of course a problem for this group as well, but they are unfamiliar with that debilitating threat which is the panic attack, as they most likely have not experienced one before.
So how should a person with an anxiety issue tackle public speaking?
Stage one is accepting that all these bizarre and quite frankly unnerving sensations are not going to go away overnight. In fact, you are not even going to concern yourself with getting rid of them for your next talk. When they arrive during a speech/meeting, you are going to approach them in a new manner. What we need to do is build your confidence back to where it used to be before any of these sensations ever occurred. This time you will approach it in a unique, empowering manner, allowing you to feel your confidence again. It is said that most of the top speakers are riddled with anxiety before speaking, but they somehow use this nervousness to enhance their speech. I am going to show you exactly how to do this, although I know that right now if you suffer from public speaking and panic attacks you may find it difficult to believe you can ever overcome it.
My first point is this and it is important. The average healthy person can experience an extreme array of anxiety and very uncomfortable sensations while giving a speech and is in no danger of ever losing control, or even appearing slightly anxious to the audience. No matter how tough it gets, you will always finish your piece, even if at the outset it feels very uncomfortable to go on. You will not become incapacitated in any way.
The real breakthrough for if you suffer from public speaking and panic attacks happens when you fully believe that you are not in danger and that the sensations will pass.
“I realize you (the anxiety) hold no threat over me.”
What keeps a panic attack coming again and again is the fear of the fear—the fear that the next one will really knock your socks off and you feel you were lucky to have made it past the last one unscathed. As they were so unnerving and scary, it is your confidence that has been damaged by previous anxiety episodes. Once you fully understand you are not under any threat, then you can have a new response to the anxiety as it arises while speaking.
Defeating public speaking and panic attacks...
There is always a turning point when a person moves from general anxiety into a panic attack, and that happens with public speaking when you think to yourself:
"I won’t be able to handle this in front of these people."
That split second of self-doubt leads to a rush of adrenaline, and the extreme anxiety arrives in a wave like format. If, however, when you feel the initial anxiety and you react with confidence that this is not a threat to you, you will move out of the anxiety rapidly. Using this new approach is a powerful ally because it means it is okay to feel scared and feel the anxiety when speaking–that is fine; you are going to feel it and move with and through the sensations in your body and out the other side. Because he or she is feeling very anxious, often before the talk has begun, that person may feel they have already let themselves down. Now, you can relax on that point. It is perfectly natural to feel the anxiety. Take for example the worst of the sensations you have ever experienced in this situation—be it general unease to loss of breath. You will have an initial automatic reaction that says:
“Danger–I’m going to have an episode of anxiety here and I really can’t afford that to happen.”
At this point most people react to that idea and confirm it must be true because of all of the unusual feelings they are experiencing. This is where your thinking can lead you down a train of thought that creates a cycle of anxiety that produces a negative impact on your overall presenting skills.
So let that initial “oh dear, not now” thought pass by, and follow it up immediately with the attitude of:
“There you are–I’ve been wondering when you would arrive. I’ve been expecting you to show up—by the way, I am not in the least threatened by any of the strange sensations you are creating—I am completely safe here.”
The key to controlling your fear of public speaking and panic attacks is that instead of pushing the emotional energy and excitement down into your stomach, you are moving out through it. Your body is in a slightly excited state, exactly as it should be while giving a speech, so release that energy in your self-expression. Push it out through your presentation not down into your stomach. You push it out by expressing yourself more forcefully. In this way you turn the anxiety to your advantage by using it to deliver a speech where you come across more alive, energetic and in the present moment. When you notice the anxiety drop as it does when you willingly move into it. Fire a quick thought off when you get a momentary break (as I am sure you have between pieces), asking it for “more.” You want more of its intense feelings as you are interested in them and are absolutely not threatened by them.
It seems like a lot of things to be thinking about while talking to a group of people, but it is not really. You’d be amazed how many different non-related thoughts you can have while speaking. This approach is about adopting a new attitude of confidence to what you might have deemed a serious threat up until now. This tactic will truly help you with fear of public speaking and panic attacks you have associated with them.
If your predominant fear of the speaking engagement is driven by a feeling of being trapped, then I would suggest factoring in some mental releases that can be prepared before the event. For example, some meetings/speeches allow for you to turn the attention back to the room to get feedback etc. from the group.
If possible, you might want to prepare such opportunities in your own mind before the engagements. This is not to say you have to ever use them, but people in this situation often remark that just having small opportunities where attention can be diverted for the briefest of moments can make the task seem less daunting. It may even be something as simple as having people introduce themselves or opening the floor to questions. I realize these diversions are not always possible and depend on the situation, but anything you can factor in that makes you feel less trapped or under the spotlight is worth the effort and can help alleviate fear of public speaking and panic attacks.
Click Here to learn more
Joe Barry is an international panic disorder coach. His informative site on all issues related to panic and anxiety attacks can be found here:http://www.panicportal.com
This article is copywritten material
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